Here comes the (t)rain

Ah English weather.

just as the cold and bitter winds pass as the first day of spring entered almost as quickly if a chapter in a book had turned. The first paragraph of this spring chapter was not merely into its first sentence when the rains of England had greeted me and joined with me in my mile walks to the bus stop in Headington-- because heavens know that Risinghurst deserves no bus stop that is effective at all.

in my notation of public transport, I have discovered, despite all its errs, Los Angeles has a more cost friendly and commendable train system from the outskirts to the inner city areas (IE San Bernardino to Hollywood) for a much more reasonable price.

now, seeing as exchange rates are still in place, and the value still shifts. I will use the great example of the cost of food. And not just any food, but stadium food.

for the cost of two dodger dogs, or a Chipotle Burrito with Soda and an extra little thing of salsa (8.50 USD or around 5.20GBP). One can get a return (two way) ticket from San Bernardino to Hollywood (around 80miles, or 120km)
this includes a day pass on the LAMETRO system of buses and underground railways.

conversely, the cost of a trip to London from Oxford (51miles, or 87km) via train
2 large strawberries with creme at wimbly, or 4 creme teas at Queen Street Coffee (oldest coffee house in the world) (12GBP or around 21.50USD)
for a single (one way) to London. Standard seating. No day pass for the underground whilst in London. Nor buses.
4 large strawberries with creme at wimbly, or a nice meal for a you and a lady friend that you met at lecture and want to woe (at the beef eater, one of the better restaurants in England, but English food will be another subject entirely) (24GBP or around 40USD)
for a return (two way) to London and if you have a student card, that's right, no underground daypass.

Now, often I hear "California has such a horrible public transportation system, we should emulate the Europeans" to which I simply state "Nein Herr Dummkopf" or as the Spanish would say "No Señor Pendejo" and I abstain from the French due to the French to English dictionary I have is on strike.

now that I think about it, the librarians are on strike here in England, as with the city mantiance union, and the civic workers as well. All over their pention schemes that are becoming insolvent.

fortunately, my umbrella, English-made by London Fog (which I have yet to experience in my adventures here) has not failed me like theParisiann system of society (which mind you her majesty's foreign office has, as of 5 days ago declared "UNSAFE" for travelers) and at the cost of the train system, I doubt that they will be striking any time soon.

Row Row Row your Boat

Ah Emma was a fine dingy, in fact, one of the finest in the fleet of Her Majesty's Royal Thames River Armada. Swift and exact along the river's waters she went.

this would be true, however, if an ore had worked properly, not giving my right arm the mighty difference in stream controls. Thus careening the vessel into the banks of the canals and low hanging branches. Some causing us to duck into the vessel's hull, barely skimming the low hang of the thick extentions and growths. Fortunately, away from the prying eyes of the construction workers that I had gain'd nonmocking passage by understanding the following

the second bar to lady of Spain.

yes, but whistling the tune to the old sailors hymn, I had gained applauds and safe passage on to the magdalin college's stretch of river. Our course to the Thames was underway. Fortunately for our egos, no errors of commanding the ship had occurred short of the pull out from the docks, always a tricky maneuver to attempt. Or a 4 point turn under the magdalin college bridge....Which was caused by the turn out from the docking. Aided by record low river levels.

with fairly low to do, we encountered a tree branch, which, mind you, the two sets of eyes... Women's eyes mind you, had failed to warn me of entirely. Thus sending us under its wispy wrath of small branches and twiggery which caused no damage and lead to a fit of the giggles amongst the crew.

on the second of such encounters, first mate Hannah made the statement of "if the impact wont kill us. The cold of the water surely will"

aside from this, no major incidents occurred. Barring the full on collation (mind you, after a WOMAN was given charge over the port side ore) with the river bank, to the awe of a score and 4 English citizens, forced to watch the shame of such a proud English ship.

I count a score and 4, as the other 5 were Chinese, and counted not as it was merely another photograph moment to behold the English culture.

if only they knew.

Patrion Saint of the Irish vs. Jonathan

Saw a man dressed in silver with a glass ball. the day after st patrick's day

and a few heroin addicts asking for handouts.

it is a serious problem it seems in the UK (hence the success of pieces such as Reqrium for a Dream, or Trainspotting). but not so serious that I can't say "zee velfar state ziz veiry large, und you arure not in ze crack" when they ask for "loose change"

I say it in a thickin'd accent as to remove any anti american attitudes (4 pt alliteration!)

it is fun to apply Haym Solomon to real life situations.
if oh how I wish to become as fluent in multiple languages as that man (eight languages). perhaps another trip is inorder to this continent sans Hannah or other Americans to force language skills.

Jonathan: *whislt walking into an Irish Pub in toe with sister and two other americans* "Ustedes Necesitan reconastar-- Nostoros somos Mexicanos"
Elise: ok, so not Americans, got it.

refrained from Alcohol again. at the last minute
Jonathan: If I am going to do this, I am going to do it right. I will have a guiness
*5 minutes pass*
Jonathan: I already feel woosy...best stop that drink order *run down the stairs to Elise who is about to have the drink poured*
"BELAY THAT ORDER!"
Barkeep:"Yes sir!"
Jonathan:".....grenadine and sprite...."
Elise: Pansy.

although, I got to be the designated walker/bus getter/take care of alcohol induced folk.

seriously, this one mile walk from the bus stop through a dodgy part of town is what makes me do this....seriously guys.

Today hannah and I went to the two big museums here in Oxford, saw the Ashmonian and the Oxford University of Natural History (got to see Dinosaur bones and the stuffed Dodo bird and said man in silver with a glass ball.)

In other news:
Figured out Finances for current expedition, of about a 5GBP a day budget-- no more...unless some benefactors donates to the paypal link, if I am going to go to the EU (France, Germany, Belgium, Luxemburg, Netherlands) visa vi Eurail and utilize a Bed and Breakfast in Nice so I may say that I swam in the Mediterrianian Sea.

of course, this plan is tenitive unless we can find some nice little island with nice little greeks on it.....or half greeks, we are not picky. I mean, prince charles is half greek.

I HEART THE MONARCHY.

so you may be saying-- 5 quid!? that is hardly enough for a sandwich and an orange juice! let alone a play, or a concert, or tax to look at a statue or to buy a blanket to keep you warm in those cold cold winternights!

ouch? not quite. blankets will be shipped into us in the next few days from homebase to prevent further cold nights. but seriously, sandwiches and orange juice....and rumor has it, the water is not up to American standards, FYI...click the link, donate with your visas, or your mom's visa, come on, think of all the great things I have done for you. like told you you look good, or how you should totally get on that (Job/Project/Assignment/Girl/Boy).

my love isn't free ya'lls. and I am collecting past due torts.....

I have made it as ze de'facto fühur und ubermïtch (I love the international keyboard setting) of the class by sole tenacity. and doing my required monologues as RoboKaupf from We Are Robots, and Kiefer Sutherland's Jack Bauer doing "Lady Winhimmer's Fan" by Oscar Wilde.


this was also inpart to a sore voice from coughing all night. although my austrian-german accent for robokaupf was spot on and gained a riot of laughter from the acting class.

seriously, it was all like "You mean more to me than anything else in the world, what does your husband give you? nothing, everything he has he gives back to the terrorist-- THERE'S NO TIME!"

and that is the kind of action that gets jonathan--- (the best way to end this is "Laid" but, seriously, has that yet to happen? naye my faithful readers...naye.)-- into high places (that one works out.).

despite my self conciousness of the whole bit, whether or not I did well or not, I think it was fun and I had a blast doing it. which is what public speaking and acting is all about.

In family news recently figured out that mother has been slated for something big in the world of humanitarian aide

like I always say: great things come from the Shidlers.

Oh! and my big brother is coming down from Spokane (the great cold, white north of grunge music and bitter nights) to come work with my dad at Shidler Real Estate Development Inc. what a wonderful turn of events indeed.

although I was plotting to head up there as soon as summer was coming round and cash flows returned from employment of my skills into the world. (note, not a job, just utilization of the awesome that is within me staged from the very creation of the universe)

mi qui' indeed... mi qui'...

So, 5 Americans Walk into a Pub....

went to a pub to do karaoke, got kicked out for NOT drinking alcohol
(their fault, didn't know how to make a sherly temple)
Belligerent Pub-Provider: Will we be drinking tonight?
Jonathan: oh, do you need ID, I don't drink, but here ya--
Belligerent Pub-Provider: --I need to know will we be drinkin' tonight? ya know this is how I make my livin' *imagin this in the most forceful tone a british man from the southshires can put on.)
Jonathan: I understand that everyone needs to make a living, so, I will have a sherly temple
BP: ?
Jonathan: Sprite and Grenadine--preferably cherry.
BP (or was it the unattractive wench? I forget.): we don't make cocktails here, only beer
Jonathan: do you have Cranberry Juice?
BP: no
Jonathan: I see. well, we are waiting for a mate to swing by, and it is always rude to start drinking without your mate. and it is also bad to drink before you do karaoke, which is why we came, so we are going to wait for her to start singing, then we are going to rouse it up
(lies on the we part of drinking on the portion of Jonathan. unless they could prove to me that fermented grains could gain me a stable walk home.)
BP: grumble-- *stares at the group of fellows for a while and my already plastered, forerunner of the sortie, friend (who he gave the same chat to hence purchased 2 pints worth of something fierce)
*5 minutes pass as we wait for our friend*
BP: *out of the blue* if you aren't going to be drinking, I wont hold these tables for you, now either buy some beer or get out (mind you, the place was empty, say 5 Americans, and 7 brits and yours truly)
Jonathan: are we going to be drinking?
Alex: *in his '3 kinds of wendsdays' slur* fuckno! this place had to put club soda into your beer to give it fiz the ugly ass-- (which was true...and he had to put club soda into his stuff because it had gone flat too.)

once again, my nonalcoholism has pushed the world to the edge...nay, the brink.

and I don't mind it at all. not at all.

Ohhh Headington--!

So, I live in this little town called Risinghurst on Kiln Lane (yes, that Kiln Lane) literally 5 houses down from CS Lewis' home 'The Kilns'

aside from that, just down the street lies the marvelous shark of headington.
now, I had not known earlier of the status of the famous shark of anti nuclear action and art. But it truly looks as though someone punched it through the roof, so much so that a kind family of pidgons are residing in the top level of the home, complete with their pidgony mess and nests.

as for the state of the town, cold is the buzz word for us Americans staying in the local homes and cottages, cold but lacking snow of any significance. How a climate can get below Zero Celsius and precipitation on a regular basis, yet retain that snow is rare is a phenomenon of serious consequences to my ability to contain frustrations at the climate.

not only did I just escape a moist-wet cold atmosphere of an unusual winter in Redlands with dips into the 5c and below temperatures or sometimes unusually warm spikes of 22c at random through out the course of 8 days or so-- no more. Where my newly adapting and resituating body chemistry was preparing for spring's cool embrace with flowers and fields to be observed in golden splendor was tricked and befuddled with mixings of hot and cold, but never temperate-- naye, but once temperate with a nice 12-18c day blue skies too boot.

alas, the moist seeps through the layers of clothing, through the nylon-cotton, silk, the wool, and the cotton again. With the tips of my fingers to suffer as the cold bites at their being and makes me clumbsy with delicate things of writing and key handling. Save only for thick snow built gloves that clash both in fashion and in ability to maintain regulation with the need to constantly utilize the builtin blow buttons to add warm breath into the vents that warm my finger tips.

this cold is to pass in time in a week or so the cold front will have left the island nation and rain can be of no bother to me as it was in the Californian landscape months before where a shirt and a covering were all that was needed to maintain face.

courses at Oriel College have been enlightening as well as bolstering of my fabric, pitching a tent of self sufficiency of thought and confidence in mind. As tutorials go about I find that theatre courses are more experience and research based than expected and political science (which, go hand in hand.) allows me to speak my mind-- much to the dismay of my sister who has found the music collection here quite to her liking


and really, that has made all the difference.

Arrival

After a long trip upon the good ship I had dubbed "le Airbus d'Sir Richard Branson" proud carrier of the british flag (as the buxom blond hair'd woman on the nose informed me) and the classic ideals of airflight, being attrative flight attendents in respectablly attractive skirts and shirts with rosey cheeks and ample proportions all-about

remember the girl the prime minister liked in Love Actually?

(this chick: most brits look like that, and I can't complain. hell, I think I am in the house at the end when hugh grant looks for her. stairway and all, heck, even the exit from the int'l port was straight from the film, art imitates life I suppose.)

The food was wonderful, the selection on the Aircraft's personal entertainment was wonderful. ranging from Coldplay and Franz Ferdinand to Serenity and "Nana"

although, I will warn, that ÆON Flux is what helped me beat jet lag, enough boobie to keep me interested, but not enough plot to keep me awake which prompted a healthy nap around 10:00 Zulu time with the aide of coldplay and moby intermixed (thank goodness for Virgin Records/EMI being all one big happy conglomorate to aide in my happiness.)

the traffic in the passport zona was interesting, as I got about 40 more questions than everyone else. however, my passport is good for 6 months in this country because it is now under a student Visa, not just a touring visa with the right to study.

aka, I can now work for 20 hours a week if I so choose.

can we say, score?

because I don't know if it means the same thing in England.

besides all that, the home I am staying in has one other American in it, named Corie who is goodnatured and nearsighted. and the paternal figure named George fishes (hence why tonight's dinner tasted so delicious.)

in about 2 days or so, Hannah and I intend on setting up an MP3 station for the enjoyment of all the children in the world.

but sadly, our real audance will have to wait till apple figures out a way to decode thought (not like it can't already with how party shuffle seems to gaze into my soul and tinker with my emotions with songs that are on my reverie all on a whim with willful wonder.) will be tinkering with the link ups untill our return 12 weeks hence.

none the less, it will be there. oh, it will be there. I will think of something cute to name it, like "Americast" or "Ameriquest" or "Capital One" something no-one else has thought up-- ever.

obviously the power converter works well enough. and the "borrowed" wifi fits the job of email, and blog updating fine. no worries on that end, however telephones seem to be hard to come by, especially odd seeing as one of the great british heros used things like the above left.

-Jonathan S.


PS, donate to the fund for a better cause on the side of the page.

how will this make the world a better place? simply by preventing me from being an American backpacker and further exemplifying the sterotype of dirty, unkempt americans who come to europe for illicit reasons.

it takes money to buy books and to be an example to the world, as the US GDP displays.